To The Kaptin Ov The Lubberly Tub C-Burpin

This morning, I found this note laying on the chart table:

To The Kaptin Ov The Lubberly Tub C-Burpin

I am gratelee plezed that yu konsidurd my greveance ov a serius enuff natur to hav delt with it in a timelee and c-men like way.

I am well pripaird to akxept your termz and shall therfour konsidur the matter klosed. I rekwest that my deesishun be duly enturd in the Log.

I also wish it to be nown that sirtin persons nown to me and widelee thout to be udderlee reliabull and trustworthee hav brout to my atinshun that one PJ, fytur pilut & fisher burd, is well nowed to be a scoundril, skalleewag, nerr do well, cheetur at cardz and dice, lay about, shurkir of wurk, poor shipmate without tabull manurz and eetz with hiz beek opun.

I wish theze thingz to be nown by yu in advans of him not fulfilling his obligayshuns as they pertane to this mattur.

PS- pleze xkewz my behavur ov last nite. I was grogged and knot my uzhuwool self.

Knowing opportunity when it knocks, I seized the moment. Salty and I shook upon it, and given that PJ will uphold his end, laid the whole sorry affair to rest. Bygones be bygones and all that.

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